Time for part 2 of my list of 5 least favorite foods. In today's installment I give you the remainder of my list:
#3: Raisins - Aside from the fact that it looks like a dead bug and probably has a very similar consistency (I assume this fact having never intentionally eaten a bug), raisins are basically rotten fruit. Take a grape, leave it out in the sun for a few days and VOILA! you have raisins. Why would I want that?
I feel very similarily toward "sun-dried" tomoatoes. I'm fairly certain they only call them "sun-dried" because calling them what they are, "fell off the vine and were left in the dirt only to be picked up a few days later" tomatoes, is very hard to market to people, let alone fit on a package.
#3: Raisins - Aside from the fact that it looks like a dead bug and probably has a very similar consistency (I assume this fact having never intentionally eaten a bug), raisins are basically rotten fruit. Take a grape, leave it out in the sun for a few days and VOILA! you have raisins. Why would I want that?
I feel very similarily toward "sun-dried" tomoatoes. I'm fairly certain they only call them "sun-dried" because calling them what they are, "fell off the vine and were left in the dirt only to be picked up a few days later" tomatoes, is very hard to market to people, let alone fit on a package.
#2: Beef Liver - I have a sneaking suspicion that many of you will be with me on this one. I don't think I have to explain much here. It's organ meat. Not only is it organ meat but it's an organ that filters toxins. Not only is it an organ that filters toxins but it's an organ from an animal that has a disease named after an angry version of itself. All that being said, I will devour a porterhouse steak so I guess a cow can't be all bad. I just won't eat their organs or drink their...
#1: Milk - by far my least favorite food*. The fact that it's higher on the list than beef liver tells you how much I dislike Milk. But, much like the maligned tomato, it's milk in it's natural state that I have a problem with. Turn it into ice cream or, even better, into a big block of cheese and you're talking about some of my favorite foods but this is my list and I'll dislike what I want.
Let me just tell you my issue with milk. First and foremost, it's basically cow juice. Here's what I mean. You squeeze a lemon and you get lemon juice. Squeeze a grape and you get grape juice. Squeeze a coconut and you get, well that's a bad example. Walk up to a cow, squeeze something dangling between it's legs and you get, drumroll please, that's right, cow juice! You want me to drink what comes out of something I squeeze between a cows legs? Yeah right! You know who should be drinking cow's milk? That's right, baby cows! Not people. We drink people milk and not only that, we stop when we're still infants. Unless your mom is that lady that was on the Time magazine cover. If that's the case than you might still be drinking people milk when you're fingerpainting in kindergarten. But that's another list.
So there you have it. My list of 5 least favorite foods. My friend Courtney pointed out that I also have a very strong opinion about a particular beverage so as an added bonus I'll give you one of my least favorite beverages as well: Pepsi, or as I once referred to it, Poopsi. I know this is getting in to an area that causes some serious debate similar to Democrat VS Republican or Ford VS Chevy (who really argues about that anymore though), but I am firmly on the side of Coke when it comes to Coke VS Pepsi. As I commented to Courtney I would rather drink a glass full of dirty lake water than a can of Pepsi. If I ask for a Coke in a restaurant and the server tells me they have Pepsi, I'll ask for tap water instead.
That's it for this edition of Listomania! I hope you enjoyed it.
* I realize that some may argue that milk is actually a beverage but because of its high nutrition content it's classified as a food by the FDA. Therefore, it makes my list of 5 least favorite foods and not 5 least favorite beverages.
#1: Milk - by far my least favorite food*. The fact that it's higher on the list than beef liver tells you how much I dislike Milk. But, much like the maligned tomato, it's milk in it's natural state that I have a problem with. Turn it into ice cream or, even better, into a big block of cheese and you're talking about some of my favorite foods but this is my list and I'll dislike what I want.
Let me just tell you my issue with milk. First and foremost, it's basically cow juice. Here's what I mean. You squeeze a lemon and you get lemon juice. Squeeze a grape and you get grape juice. Squeeze a coconut and you get, well that's a bad example. Walk up to a cow, squeeze something dangling between it's legs and you get, drumroll please, that's right, cow juice! You want me to drink what comes out of something I squeeze between a cows legs? Yeah right! You know who should be drinking cow's milk? That's right, baby cows! Not people. We drink people milk and not only that, we stop when we're still infants. Unless your mom is that lady that was on the Time magazine cover. If that's the case than you might still be drinking people milk when you're fingerpainting in kindergarten. But that's another list.
So there you have it. My list of 5 least favorite foods. My friend Courtney pointed out that I also have a very strong opinion about a particular beverage so as an added bonus I'll give you one of my least favorite beverages as well: Pepsi, or as I once referred to it, Poopsi. I know this is getting in to an area that causes some serious debate similar to Democrat VS Republican or Ford VS Chevy (who really argues about that anymore though), but I am firmly on the side of Coke when it comes to Coke VS Pepsi. As I commented to Courtney I would rather drink a glass full of dirty lake water than a can of Pepsi. If I ask for a Coke in a restaurant and the server tells me they have Pepsi, I'll ask for tap water instead.
That's it for this edition of Listomania! I hope you enjoyed it.
* I realize that some may argue that milk is actually a beverage but because of its high nutrition content it's classified as a food by the FDA. Therefore, it makes my list of 5 least favorite foods and not 5 least favorite beverages.
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